You’ve been chatting online with this really hot girl for a while now…
You’ve managed to walk that tricky line between making sure she knows you like her, without being too eager or coming off as pushy.
Those studies are right: texting has become a big part of escalating your relationship… In fact, it’s been going so well, that it’s tempting to keep your relationship online a little longer…
For another, the Association For Psychological Sciencecautions that chatting online for too long before meeting face to face can cause people to develop unreasonable expectations.
So, how do you take your promising online relationship with a hot new girl to the next level?
Make her desperate to meet you, and make sure your IRL meeting goes well?
Like the kind of “goes well” that ends at your place… With her naked… on your bed… wet and waiting…
You need to establish “pre-attraction.”
Here’s what that is and how to do it, in 5 simple steps:
When you’re chatting online with a potential date, she’s trying to decide whether or not to meet face to face…
She’s chatting with a bunch of guys. You need to make sure she’s attracted to you before meeting. Not just likes talking to you, but is attracted to you.
If she’s already attracted, she can’t wait to meet you.
You’re not begging her to meet up… hoping she’ll pick you… like you…
If you’ve done the work, and she’s pre-attracted, she is actually the one pushing for the meeting.
Luckily, there’s tons of research about female desire and online dating that you can use to get her wet, ready, and thinking about you.
To have her pre-attracted to you, and ready to act on her desires, as soon as she sets eyes on you.
I’ve done all the research (including the personal research, if you know what I mean…), and narrowed it down to these 5 steps:
Simply follow these steps to ensure that when you meet up IRL, you’ve got a hot woman waiting to jump on your d*ck…
1) Build Trust
Communicating via electronic messaging can allow people to be a bit more open and vulnerable than they would be otherwise. However, there’s plenty of evidence that people misrepresent themselves in an online environment.
Enough women have been burned by this (I sure have!) that most of us women now proceed with caution.
If you are chatting online, your potential date will likely be somewhat skeptical of what you say.
To make yourself appear more trustworthy, throw in a bit of vulnerability to your online chats.
My husband makes jokes at his own expense about his too-big ears, or his intelligence when chatting with women he wants to meet.
It works — women know if he is willing to be honest about something potentially embarrassing, he’s probably honest about other things…
The reward of letting some of your insecurities out, is that she will open up to you as well.
Being vulnerable will breed a level of intimacy that will make her trust you by the time you can meet up in person.
2) Be Responsive
One of the barriers to online dating is the inability to develop a realistic exchange.
You’re not always talking in real time (which can be a help, while you think of things to say), and you’re not getting that instant feedback and support you get in person.
Now that you know about that potential complication, however, you can work around it.
Women are more likely to climb into your bed if you make them feel important and heard.
Ask about her day, let her vent about her mother or her job, and send silly memes to make her smile. Listen to what she has to say, and ask follow up questions.
If she tells you, she has a stressful day coming up, check-in and ask her how it went. (You can make a note on your phone or set an alarm to remind yourself to text her at the end of that day…)
3) Video Calls Can Be a Bridge
According to research, face to face interactions of at least 20 minutes improve a person’s impression of a potential partner they met online.
It’s best to initiate some video time within the first three weeks; otherwise this step can have the opposite effect…
A video call allows a woman to see that you are who you seem to be online.
I’ve never met a woman who has tried online dating who hasn’t experienced catfishing.
She’s going to be wary of believing what you text. So show her early on that you’re who you say you are.
A face-to-face chat can build trust, and when women trust you, they’re more likely to get naked…
To pitch a video call, let your date know that you find her incredibly engaging and would love to have a chance to see her smile, and an opportunity to make her laugh.
Give her a range of times that work for a video call and schedule a set length for the first interaction.
Setting an end time ensures you leave her wanting more, and shows that you respect her time.
4) Get Her Thinking About Sex… With YOU
Research shows that female desire begins in the brain. When you’re chatting online with a woman, you are in a terrific position to activate her passion.
Don’t start an interaction with a blatant discussion of sexual preferences. Last week one man I matched with on Tinder sent me a list of all the sex acts he was into, including pegging.
He received an immediate block.
However, another man I’ve been chatting with for a couple of weeks is tops on my list for an afternoon delight…
Why? He isn’t afraid to let me know he’s interested, but he never gets blatantly sexual in our conversations.
I’m not saying you have to avoid all discussion of sex, but it shouldn’t be the bulk of your communication. Igniting female desire involves letting a woman know that you find them both attractive and exciting.
Once you’ve established a rapport and the woman knows you aren’t a creep, you can send a suggestive or flirty text.
During a video date, tell her that you’d like to massage her stressed shoulders, or caress her long, lovely legs.
Research shows that women fantasize about erotic sensations, and if you can get her fantasizing about your touch, in particular, you’ll be one step closer to getting her in your bed…
5) When You Meet Up… Here’s How to Seal the Deal…
If you’ve successfully pre-attracted her… then trust me, women like me are DYING to be touched… in the right way…
But touched in the RIGHT way… at the RIGHT times… that keeps me on my toes and turns me on, subtly… with a desire that builds and builds, until all I can think about is taking my clothes off (!)
Seriously. Me, and literally every other girl on the planet, is dying for a guy who knows how to touch us during casual conversation… in a way that makes us unable to stop thinking about what he’ll do to us in the bedroom.
Because we want to date, we want sex, we want to build a connection, and we want to be touched… It makes us feel sexy, wanted, and appreciated. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve talked to a guy online… got excited to meet him… got wet thinking about his touch…
…only to be wildly disappointed because of how clueless he is about touching me. I’m not alone here.
MOST women have gone through this, and we all hate it.
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